By Amber J. Chapman of AJC Copywriting & Editing and member of NAWBO Northeast Ohio
Being a business owner has its learning curves. Surprisingly, there are many times when the wisdom we gain is not related to our field of expertise, or even operations, it’s self-discovery.
This time last year, I was not in a good place. I love what I do, but I wanted nothing more than to call it quits. The joy I had for my business was gone and, in its place…exhaustion. I fantasized about packing a truck, grabbing a camper and disappearing. I wanted to drive across the country and didn’t care what state I wound up in, as long as there were no cell phones, texts or emails, just solitude. It was a ridiculous idea. I don’t even own a truck or a camper. Besides, there were way too many people counting on me. What should have been a season of rejuvenating before the fall business rush was instead a mess.
“Be your own boss,” they said. “It will be fun,” they said. Fair to say, I was not having any fun.
It was a wake-up call. As I stood in my dining room one day, still half dreaming about star gazing in national parks at night and fishing in streams during the day, I wondered something. What if all my issues weren’t exterior? What if it was not the work, the people or the things going on around me…what if it was me? Was it possible that I was melting down, not because people were depending on me…but maybe because I couldn’t depend on (gulp) myself? Had I been neglecting myself? How long had this been going on, so much that it was the norm? Was I on the brink of burnout?
The truth is many of us are caught in this type of cycle. We pour everything into our business and take care of those around us, and it’s often at the expense of our own well-being. The days pass, weeks, then months, even years, without a thought of what we need or want. We worry that if we stop, or step away even for a minute, things will come crashing down. It’s actually the opposite.
Deep down, I knew running away wasn’t the answer. So, I forced myself to take a hard look at what was causing me so much stress. Was it my perfectionist tendencies? Maybe a bit of my newly diagnosed ADHD? Maybe it was something else entirely.
I decided I couldn’t do it alone. So, I leaned into my support system. I confided in my NAWBO sisters, and they were there to listen. Offering me invaluable insights, it turned out that many of them had been in my shoes in the past. So, with their encouragement, I started prioritizing self-care. With the help of my colleagues, and a few of my closest clients behind me, I took a big step…I took a break. Instead of a cross-country adventure, I chose a more realistic escape: a cabin in the mountains of New York, followed by “a few days of me.” When I came home, I fought the urge to go back to “business as usual.” I went out for some lemon ice cream at the beach, had some sushi and watched a play. I even bought a new novel for a little leisure reading. I was starting to feel like myself again.
Sadly, I could not remember the last time I had done anything for me or taken time off to just be.
Here are some things I learned last summer:
- Time for yourself is not a luxury; it’s a necessity (and non-negotiable with other people, even yourself). Schedule short breaks throughout the day to catch your breath, eat or meditate.
- Put yourself on your calendar first and then protect your ‘me’ time fiercely!
- Know what you need…know what would make YOU happy.
- Set some boundaries with friends, family and clients.
- Reevaluate what you say yes to, especially if it means saying no to yourself.
- Ask for help (you are not alone here).
We are so good at taking care of and supporting others, but often we forget about ourselves entirely. It’s not selfish to take care of you, it’s an investment in your business’s long-term success! Remember to extend the same grace and support to yourself that you have been extending to others. It will help, I promise.
About the Author…
Amber J. Chapman is a Cleveland, Ohio, area editor and writer and the owner of AJC Copywriting & Editing. She helps business owners, authors and speakers find the right words and avoid the wrong ones. Through effective listening and valuable collaboration, she pinpoints the message, identifies issues and infuses clarity. The result is an elevated message that reaches the target audience the way it was intended. Amber is a proud member of NAWBO and feels blessed to be a part of an invaluable sisterhood of compassionate, hard-working women who make it their mission to help each other up the ladder.