By Jennifer Fidder, owner of Jennifer Fidder Coaching LLC and member of NAWBO South Florida
The first business I built after moving to the U.S. 15 years ago was a personal fitness training business. The early years were tough. I spent so much time, money and energy building a website, learning marketing and designing offers for clients who never showed up.
What frustrated me most was that I felt constantly busy (and I was!), yet nothing seemed to pay off. No clients. No income.
Eventually, I realized that while I was working non-stop, I wasn’t doing the things that would actually bring in clients or revenue. I was fooling myself into thinking I was being productive, when in reality, I was procrastinating. I spent hours rewriting my website, perfecting course materials, redesigning logos…time-consuming tasks that didn’t move my business forward.
At the time, I thought procrastination and perfectionism were the problem. But after years of training in hypnosis, NLP and mindset work, I discovered they weren’t the issue at all. They were just symptoms.
The real problem?
Fear.
My mind had created those patterns to protect me from what I feared most: failure.
“What if this doesn’t work out?”
“I don’t want to let my family down.”
“I can’t bear to hear someone say, ‘I told you so.’”
Sound familiar?
After working as a hypnotist with female entrepreneurs for the past five years, I know I’m not alone. Fear is one of the most common hidden blocks keeping women from fully showing up in their businesses and taking the risks needed to grow.
The Three Hidden Fears That Keep You Stuck
The most common subconscious fears I see are:
- Fear of Failure
- Fear of Rejection
- Fear of Success
These fears often don’t look like fear. They show up as procrastination, perfectionism or imposter syndrome; even in women who’ve been in business for years.
So how can you tell which fear is at play?
Start Listening to Your Inner Dialogue
If you’re stuck, pause. Grab a pen and paper, find a quiet space and tune in to your thoughts.
Ask yourself:
- What thoughts keep coming up?
- What’s the story I’m telling myself?
- What am I afraid might happen?
Write it all down. Then, group your thoughts under:
Fear of Failure, Fear of Rejection, or Fear of Success (or create your own category).
Here are a few examples:
Fear of Failure
- What if this doesn’t work out?
- I don’t think I can do this.
Fear of Rejection
- What if nobody signs up?
- What will people think if I put myself out there?
Fear of Success
- What if I change when I succeed?
- What will my partner think if I out-earn them?
You might notice your thoughts fit into more than one category and that’s okay.
How Do You Get Unstuck?
Recognizing your fear is essential, but awareness alone isn’t always enough. You need to be able to move through the fear, or at least act in spite of it.
As a hypnotist, I’m obviously biased and believe that hypnosis is one of the best ways to tackle your fears.
But even if you don’t have a hypnotist on speed dial, here’s something simple you can do right now:
Use a Pattern Interrupt
A pattern interrupt stops a negative thought in its tracks. It’s fast, easy and surprisingly effective.
The moment you catch your mind spiraling, interrupt it by doing one of these:
- Hold up your hand and say “STOP” (out loud or in your mind)
- Picture a silly word like “cauliflower”
- Snap your fingers or clap
The goal is to break the loop of overthinking or self-doubt long enough to take action.
Is this a permanent fix? No. But it gives your brain a moment to shift gears, and that’s often all you need to move forward.
And if you ask me? The ability to take consistent action, even when it’s uncomfortable, is the single biggest factor in long-term business success.
About the Author…
Jennifer Fidder, M.A., CPT, CPPC, CTRLPrac, is owner of Jennifer Fidder Coaching LLC. She is a social psychologist, hypnotist and speaker with a background in the health and wellness field and nearly two decades of coaching experience. She teaches others how to use the power of their subconscious mind to experience more happiness, health and success. Her passion lies in helping female entrepreneurs overcome their fears, doubts and insecurities so they can get unstuck, become more confident and take massive action toward their goals. While her company is based in Miami, FL, Jennifer works with clients worldwide. Learn more here.